Tomorrow we'll find out Max's engraftment level again. We're hoping for the very best!
Also, there's another thing I would like everyone's help with. It seems as though I have some trouble trusting in God to take care of Max. I notice a lot of families have the f.r.o.g. (fully rely on God) and others know that God is looking out for them and everything is for the best. I have looked into God's track record and it has been very impressive. Just in the last couple of years, God has brought us to KY where Max was diagnosed as soon as he was born and since then God made sure that our journey was very smooth. God made sure we were in Cincinnati, not Minnesota which is much farther away from home and countless of other miracles. We are so blessed and I am so grateful for everything. Why can't I fully trust that God will carry us through the rest of this? I just feel like I don't know God very well and can't trust what I don't know. For everyone that truly trusts and relies on God - how do you do it? Any suggestions?
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Dearest Yana,
ReplyDeleteAs we are as human beings, it's very hard to trust into something that you can't see or touch. But as you said God has done very well and I can say the same for us as well. It's very hard to see His plan because we can't see that far in advance. Why are you saying that you don't know God? To be honest, I don't know any people who FULLY trust God. Just pray - it will make you feel better... promise! Love you guys! You guys are in my thoughts and prayers every day...
Thanks Kira, I appreciate the thoughts so much, but I have been praying and it doesn't look like it's been helping. I wish God would let me in on his plan at least a little bit. I know I just have to let go and TRUST that God has good intentions for us, but I really do prefer to know what's going on.
ReplyDeleteRemember what we've talked about. You can do it!
ReplyDeleteLove,
Meredith
I sure am trying!
ReplyDeleteLove,
yana
Yana, I pray for max everyday.I think you're truely amazing! What you're going through is really not easy. But just remember, we don't have much control when it comes to the outcome of things.The main thing is to know we're trying our hardest. After trying my hardest for somthing, I tell myself "Let go & let G-D"
ReplyDeleteps. we're in Galus-exile. We as humans don't have it easy. We're suffering in our personal lives and in the world at large. I believe G-D is suffering to so to speak as well. He has a vission of what he would like this world to be...a better place. All I can suggest is to continue to be the best we can be, try our hardest in the things we do, and remember G-D, bring him into our lives- try to ease His pain(by doing small acts of goodness and kindness, which makes the world a better place)and in return pray to G-D that he ease our pain and help us get through our harships of life! luv you & miss you
Menucha
Thanks, Menucha. I just noticed this post and I wish I had seen it earlier, because it's very helpful to me. This makes sense, and when there is nothing left to do, I guess I have to let G-d. So, here we go. Thank You and much love, Yana
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